I'm not gonna argue the right or wrong, debate the merits of each persons modus operandi, or try to convince anyone of the way that males and females "should" act in a relationship. I think in this present day and age, what would have previously been considered "traditional roles" in a romantic partnership seem to piss a lot of people off. So I'm not even gonna go there. People get so butt hurt so readily if you try to broadly attach any sorts of relationship behaviors to either sex. And honestly, that's really not what I am getting at in this article. So I am not going to use the words feminine or masculine at all. Let's just say, dominant and submissive. I'll leave it completely up to you to assign these words to whatever side of a relationship that you want.
I would however go toe to toe with you any day of the week over the fact that exists by which your behavior and the way that you conduct yourself directly drives what you get back from your partner. I love to examine the psychology of relationships. It's just so damn fascinating to me. I'm almost 40, and after years of observation, personal mistake making, litmus testing, in depth analysis, long drunk nights contemplating, and countless hours listening to my friends complain to me about their partners, I am past the point of questioning. This is a FACT: You get the exact opposite out of your partner from the way that YOU are acting.
If you're the type or person that believes that two dominant people can make it, have a healthy union, or function in any semblance of a team together, you're plain out lying to yourself. The same can be said for those of you that truly believe that two submissive people can be successful in a relationship. You don't have to accept or agree with my stance here, and that's fine. Keep on believing as you believe. The Universe/God/Mother Nature, however, doesn't give a shit about what you think though. The facts are that our entire existence adheres to a set of rules by which a system of balance, polarity, and opposites attracting keeps order in the physical dimension we all come down here to play in. The intermingling of the stars and planets, the very atoms that comprise every spec of your body, and yes - the relationship that you have with this other human being you're wanting to be in love with all live and die by this system. It's just the way it is. One side is dominant, one side is submissive. Without this relation, there is NO relationship. Two dominant style partners will constantly butt heads. There can only be one captain of the ship. Conversely, two submissive types will never make it. They'll have no direction, as nobody is capable of taking the lead. They squabble and wallow while going nowhere. I didn't make the system. Blame somebody else other than me if you don't like it.
But forget about the cosmos and your bodily molecules, let's talk about your shitty relationship, or lack there of, and why it is that way. The point is that an opposite and inverse relationship exists...always.
Therefore:
If you're a person that wishes to be in the driver's seat, take the lead, be the rock in the relationship, etc., you have got to analyze how you are showing up. If you exhibit submissive traits or don't have the strength to stand firm when your partner tries to move you off center, you're mainly going to attract dominant people. You're perplexed perhaps. You want to be the dominant one, but you just can't figure out why things are the way they are between you two. This is YOUR fault. You get the exact opposite of the way that you act.
If you're the type of person who likes to relax into the ease and comfort of being in the supportive role, have a STRONG partner who truly acts as your keeper and protector, desire to have a person that you can sincerely respect, admire, look up to and TRUST to always take you in a positive direction, you have got to analyze the way that you are showing up. You're probably confused why you can't attract the type of partner that you really want. You're trying to dominate most likely, and this will never work if you honestly desire the things that I have just mentioned. This is YOUR fault. You get the exact opposite of the way that you act.
If you are happy with the dynamics of your relationship, by all means, keep doing exactly what you are doing. If that is your end goal, I'm just affirming that what you are doing is working. I'm not arguing that there is anything wrong with that. For both males and females, you can be whatever way you want to be in this life. You are free to exist on either side of the Ying Yang symbol that you please. But if something's just off. Doesn't feel right. Things aren't functional. You aren't happy. I'm here to remind you that the age old saying still holds true. Opposites attract, but stop your bitching about it already.
I'm so tired of hearing both sexes gripe about this bullshit. I know WAY too many women who complain about how men act toward them. Same thing for the guys. All they do is complain. At some point in time things changed. Things have pretty much done a 180 as far as the traits of the sexes are concerned. Like I said, I'm not gonna argue weather or not that's right or wrong. Hey, it's a glorious new age, right? I merely aim to point out the facts of reality. Maybe you like this "new" state of being? Maybe you hate it? Maybe you wonder why lots of relationships end miserably? I challenge you to look within and analyze the way that YOU are acting. If you're not getting what you want, examine YOUR behavior. Maybe make some changes? Maybe don't? I don't really care, but don't bitch about not getting what you want out of your partner when you act in such a fashion. Some form of polarity is needed. You get to decide which "pole" you want to be. That's a direct derivative of the way you are showing up in your relationship.
Point. Blank. Period.
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